Things I'll NEVER stop wanting

There are some things in life that you just can't give up on. Things that you know will never come true but you can't help but yearn for. I find it absolutely appalling that I can't/don't have these things... and yet, at this point, just the wanting them has become hilarious in and of itself... until I think about ACTUALLY having them and HOW COOL it would be. :sigh: Why God did you chose to "bless" me with such an active imagination? So unfair.

1. THE FORCE!: Why God do you taunt me with The Force? I WANT IT!!! I want to be a freaking Jedi soooooo bad!! I want to play mind tricks, and jump really high, and move things with my mind, sooooo cool. (Yes I know, I'm a dork face, I know. But that doesn't make Star Wars any less cool!!!)

2. A WARDROBE TO NARNIA!: Again, God you horrible tease! Alternate universes are so cool, I want one! I want to talk to trees and beavers and fauns! Guh! Life is so unfair! hahaha

3. I WANT TO BE BFF'S WITH FAMOUS PEOPLE!: They just seem more interesting than normal people (Penny in Almost Famous was right!) I want to have a domino night with Hugh Hefner, be BFF's with Slash, I would LOVE LOVE LOVE to make an album with U2, and I would LOVE to date Mathew Morrison... he's a damn dream boat. lol

4. A PERSONAL LIBRARY: Okay, as an English major, book nerd, and biblio, I am currently on my way to creating my own library, but my dream is to have a lovely library like the one in Beauty and the Beast... I would like it to also be filled with super cool antiques!!!

5. A PHOTOGRAPHIC MEMORY: My goal in life is to be infallible, and just knowledgeable about EVERYTHING, my horrible memory is just not cutting it!!! guh!

So those are my top five impossible wishes, if anyone can help me out PLEASE DO IT!!!

Thanks! <3

DON'T CALL IT A COME BACK!

So, for those of you who don't know, I'm a burlesque dancer- and I LOVE IT!!! My love affair with pin up culture started in high school and continues to grow stronger every year!

On Saturday I performed Burlesque with my ladies again for the first time in a VERY LONG TIME and it felt WONDERFUL to be on stage again!! I missed it SOOO MUCH! I love dancing burlesque! It is the most self-empowering thing a woman can do. Feel uncomfortable with your body? Take a burlesque class or a pole class and you will fall in love with YOUR body, not the body the media tells you you are supposed to have! You really connect with yourself and your body and your self image when you strut your stuff on stage! I've never felt better about myself than when I was a full-time burlesque dancer. You feel powerful, and wonderful and sexy. You can control the crowd with a flick of your wrist and the roll of your hips. Burlesque allows you to express both your sensuality and your sexuality. When you're dancing, you are ALL WOMAN! You don't have to apologize for being sensual or having a sex drive- you get to revel in it! And yes, you do go down to pasties in most troupes, but really, it's just a body. They're just boobs. If you're at a burlesque show and you've never seen boobs- have a good look because it's about time. And if you're at a show and you see boobs- it's nothing you haven't seen before. You get more nudity on cable than at a burlesque show, and you know what we're doing? DANCING! Burlesque is a form of DANCE. It is an ART FORM: the art of the tease. And we preform dance routines with the best of them!

So my first show back was at The Pike bar in Long Beach, and we perform there almost every month. It's the smallest stage EVER but the crowd is always enthusiastic and it's always a good time. I had AN ABSOLUTE BLAST!! I was only in three numbers because I'm new to the troupe, but I had two solos (both off the new Slash album bc I LOVE that album- Beautiful Dangerous and Back to Cali) which was kick ass!! Check out some of my pics, and oh hey! The OC Weekly was there- check out my other ladies! We're HOT HOT HOT!! http://www.ocweekly.com/slideshow/the-dirty-little-secrets-burlesque-nsfw-the-pike-bar-and-fish-grill-30321691

If you want to come to our next show, we are performing at the El Ray in LA on August 6th, for more information check us out at http://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Dirty-Little-Secrets-Rock-Burlesque/108754859158814

Thoughts of a Negative Nelly

Tons of thoughts have been going through my head lately, here are the ones that pop up the most

• damn, sometimes living alone sucks
• training your new boss (that no one told you was going to be your boss) to do your job sucks monkey balls
• cooking for one is PATHETIC and makes me want to cry
• work is crazy
• I work too damn hard and deserve a raise... but I also know I won't get one
• cleaning your house after three days of drunk people hanging out in it SUCKS
• I need a damn vacation
• work is crazy
• I need to lose my morals and find a rich man to take me on vacation... and also to purchase internet and tivo for my place
• I hate stupid people.
• work is crazy

clearly I'm a negative Nelly right now. Guh. Let's hope life slows down so I can catch up and as a result feel less negative about the universe!