If I bitch-slap America do you think we'll get our mojo back?

Our country is in a dire state. Our education system is crap, we are ranked the 8th country in world with college completion rates, education is always the first budget cut, teachers have over-crowded classrooms and not enough supplies to go around in addition to the fact that they don't get paid enough and their salaries are being cut (when they aren't getting pink slipped)- WHY ARE WE CONTINUING TO LET THIS HAPPEN? This means that the uneducated will inherit the earth- WHY AREN'T WE TERRIFIED?

Our health care system isn't actually a health care system, it should be called a disease management system. We aren't encouraging health, we are simply throwing pills at the problems presented by patients. IF we can get an appointment to see a doctor (I called two neurologists today as I need to be tested for a fairly serious disease and I was told by one doctor the earliest I could be seen was February 10th, the other told me February 15th- that is in almost two months, and in the mean time I'm suffering with no choice but to wait or look for another doctor in my network and hope they have more open availabilities in their schedules)they have the audacity to charge you up the wa-zoo (even assuming you have insurance and even then most people can't afford the premiums, the co pays, much less the bills that come AFTER all that nonsense). WHY AREN'T WE FIGHTING HARDER FOR CHANGE? I know that "health reform is on the way" but really, this health reform bill is absolute CRAP, even the Supreme Court is wondering if it's constitutionally sound. We need AFFORDABLE ACCESSIBLE health care. We need to be able to say, "yes I would like to be taken to the hospital in an ambulance" rather than screaming at them not to take you because you know you can't afford it. We are more afraid of debt than illness- what does that say about our current health care system? When you can't afford to go to the doctor when you are ill, how can you ever hope to be truly HEALTHY? How can you live a healthy lifestyle when you don't have access to the best way for you to do that? HOW DID WE LET THIS DECLINE HAPPEN? WHY IS THIS PROBLEM STILL NOT BEING PUSHED? WE NEED SEVERAL ALTERNATIVES RATHER THAN ONE HASTILY MADE OPTION (THAT MAY NOT BE CONSTITUTIONAL)!

Our Senate and House spend more time filibustering bills than passing them. And the bills that are passed are superfluous and do not take into account what Americans need: jobs, food, better pay, a decent home, better education, more accessible health care, a decline in the deficit, our soldiers to get a longer break between deployments (whether or not they should be deployed at all is a side issue I won't go into here), and an overall satisfaction of life in America. I don't care about laws being passed that don't allow me to talk on the phone while driving, I care about the fact that families can't afford to feed their families. I care about crime. I care about the fact that teachers are getting laid off and class sizes are increasing. I care about the fact that people have had to chose between Christmas presents and bills. DOES CONGRESS NOT CARE? WHAT ARE THEY DOING TO SOLVE THESE ISSUES?

When was the last time you though America was living up to it's potential? when was the last time you looked around and said, "Yup, this is the best we can do." Granted, we have so much more than so many in this world, but have the capacity to do better, to be better, to live better- and yet, we aren't.

WHY????

Perhaps I need to bitch-slap America and tell it to get back in the game.

Maybe we all need to take a step back and remember the words of President John F. Kennedy, "Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country." There is an awful lot of "me" in this world and we need to start looking at "we." We are one people, we are all governed by the same government, and yet we are only concerned for ourselves.

Personally, I think we all need to get our heads out of our asses and DO SOMETHING to make this country better. I've written several letters to congress and none have been returned. What's the next step? Standing on street corners rallying for a better tomorrow today? Our problems are large, and will not be solved quickly, but the complete ignorance and apathy that this country is showing for it's own problems is ASTOUNDING to me.

If you want things to get better, you have to help make them better.

WHAT HAVE YOU DONE FOR YOUR UNION TODAY? Soldiers have laid down their lives for you to live a life that you chose to live. People have fought and died for voting rights, have you voted recently? Have you informed your House Representative and Congressperson of what issues they need to be pushing for you? THIS IS A GOVERNMENT RUN BY THE PEOPLE FOR THE PEOPLE- START RUNNING IT!!!

Information on The House of Representatives (and how to find yours as well as write to them is on the top left): http://www.house.gov/

write to congress!: http://www.congress.org/congressorg/dbq/officials/?&lvl=L

Write everyone who represents you!: http://www.usa.gov/Contact/Elected.shtml

BE THE CHANGE YOU WANT TO SEE IN THE WORLD PEOPLE!

Something about the Wail of a Guitar just Calms me Down

I don't know what it is, but something about the wail of the guitar just calms me down. For some reason that blasting scream just allows me to harness my chi; the sound of the electric guitar speaks to me like nothing else in this world. It perks me up, it calms me down, it settles into my soul and I feel the release of tension as I allow the music to roll through me.

Funnily enough, I have been like this for as long as I can remember. My Dad is a Stones man and I was raised on Rock 'n' Roll, I'm also very musically inclined, so I guess I never really thought about it until my supervisor said to me one day as I was blasting 'My Michelle' (in my corporate office for all to hear- oh yeah, I'm that girl), "I don't know why but you always seem so calm when you're listening to Guns and Roses." Then she promptly began to shake her head in confusion. Now, I lauged at this and didn't really think anything of it other than to agree silently and smile, but another comment made a few days later caused me to pause.

This particular comment came from my dance manager (I'm a burlesque dancer), the last couple of solos that I have done have been to the following songs:
-Beautiful Dangerous by Fergie and Slash
-Back to Cali by Slash and Myles Kennedy
Both of those solos were very 'dancy,' and my dance experience was very apparent. So when it came time to think of a new solo I had so many ideas I almost died. When I decided to do an old fashioned burlesque strip tease to 'D'yer Maker' by Led Zeppelin, she loved it! And while the song choice is still very rock 'n' roll and very true to me, I've changed the expectations from very defined choreographic choices to free flowing body movement and pure sensuality, and my dance manager couldn't be happier. When I told her what I had finally decided on this idea (mind you I've been texting her dance/song/choreography ideas for about two weeks by this time) her response was "perfect!" And when she saw me perform it for the first time her exact response to my question of, "So did you like it?" was, "It was perfect! You're too pretty to just be the bad ass rock chick all the time."

Now I laughed at that for a long time, especially since most people find my rediculous love for hard rock hard to understand, but now I realize that it isn't necessarily the genre that moves me. I've always been very ecclectic in my music tasted, in addition to my first love (rock 'n' roll) I'm also very into jazz, blues, show tunes, dance music, you name it, if it is well done I'm in! But even in jazz and blues and show tunes, there is a guitar, and when you plug that baby in and let it sing I fall in love <3

So here's to you electic guitar players (especially Slash, he's so FREAKING TALENTED!!): thank you for the music!
xoxo Heifer Walrus

Apparenlty the universe doesn't want me to get laid- I call bullshit

So, I've been trying to do this thing called 'dating' (not exclusively, PS, more like, dating around) but everyone that I've had a few good times with apparently wants to be in a relationship: guh. Personally, I have no interest in having a relationship right now because I am emotionally exhausted from my last relationship and just want to have fun; and even though I make that clear to the people I go out with, they apparently want more than just good times, and then I have to say out loud that I don't want a relationship and that makes me feel like a complete asshole. Awesome. Gotta love that.

Anyway, I've also attempted to have mindless casual sex (to avoid the awkward situation outlined above), but apparently I'm HORRIBLE at it because I've not been able to have any. Guh. I've tried to, but people are either busy or too far, or too drunk to drive, or by the time push comes to shove I say,"to hell with it" and just go to sleep because it is just too much of a hassle. But the fact still remains that I'm not getting laid and for no reason that I can think of. Aren't men supposed to love the whole 'no strings attached' thing? Apparently the universe doesn't want me to have any 'no strings attached' relationships and I freaking call BULLSHIT because I can't be bothered to give a shit about anyone new right now. Sorry, but I can't, I've got enough of my own shit going on.

How true is all this? One of my best girlfriends and I went to go see the movie Burlesque (go see it, then go see my burlesque shows!!) and one of the previews had a scene where a girl just wants to have sex and the guy wants a relationship and she screams, "Why can't we just have sex!" at him, and my girlfriend busted up and said, "Oh my god it's your life!" So, yes, it's true, women have lost their emotions due to years of male abuse and emotional struggle and men now realize the advantages of being good to one woman at a time. What the hell? I don't want a man for Christmas I want sex for Christmas! Can we get it together here people! Jeez!

Columbus Day should be revoked

Columbus day? Really? All that fool did was get lost, kill thousands of Aborigines, and possibly seduce a Queen. Okay granted, if he really did seduce Queen Isabella, that's pretty cool, but not worthy of a National Holiday! Now, I'm all for Guido's in history, but can we celebrate someone who KNEW what he was doing please? Like DaVinci, now HE needs his own national holiday! That fool was a GENIUS!!!

Columbus day shouldn't be a holiday, at least not for anyone over the age of eight. And frankly, I don't believe in kiddy-coating history anyway. Don't tell kids that Columbus knew what he was doing or that the Pilgrims and the Indians got along. Just tell the truth! No wonder our education system is a joke! The truth is the truth, kiddy-coat it all you want but it doesn't change facts.

So revoke Columbus Day, IT'S TOTAL AND COMPLETE CRAP!!!!

Modern Medicine is a JOKE

As I sit here coughing up what remains of my pathetic excuse for lungs (thank you upper respiratory infection, thank you soooo much)I find myself thinking about how ineffectual modern medicine really is.

Think about it

- Most of the time the side effects of the pill you are prescribed are worse than the original symptom
- Modern medicine usually only seeks to destroy the symptoms, no the actual problem itself
- Doctors tuition's are often paid by the pharmaceutical companies, thus making doctors beholden to pill manufacturers than the actual practice of healing- which is what they are supposed to be doing
- You are forced to pay an arm and a leg for the privilege of seeing a doctor
- Most people, even if they have insurance, don't want to go to the doctor because they don't believe in pills or don't have the money to pay the copay and the prescription, and god help you if you need a procedure or don't have insurance at all. Although I'm pretty sure they took a page out of Rumpelstiltskin's book and will take your first-born child in exchange for a ambulance ride
- Natural cures and health care alternatives are frowned upon and more often than not are not covered in medical insurance. Holistic healers and chiropractors and massage therapists are all apart of medicine, but because the pharmaceutical company holds the laughable health care system by the balls, they are trashed talked and stigmatized as "hippy healers" who don't actually do anything but light incense and pray to Buddha that you'll get better while giving you rutabaga root tea or something ridiculous rather than taking the time to understand and explain that these are actual alternatives.

Personally, I've been prescribed more pills than I can think of and quite frankly, I think I'm worse off. I was ESPECIALLY astonished when my doctor prescribed Neurontin (this is a VERY POWERFUL pain medication that literally stops your neurons from sending pain signals to your brain- I would NEVER take or recommend this pill to ANYONE) and it took almost six months to get feeling in my appendages- no joke. I still have problems with that because I took this pill for six months.

So, I think it's time we take it to the streets- the message that modern medicine is ineffectual, our health care system is a joke, and almost no one can afford to take care of themselves like they should any way.

SO LET'S DO IT PEOPLE!! FIGHT THE FIGHT! SPREAD THE WORD THAT WHAT WE HAVE ISN'T GOOD ENOUGH! THIS IS YOUR HEALTH! WE NEED CHANGE! WE NEED ALTERNATIVES! WE NEED SOMETHING THAT WORKS AND THAT WON'T BREAK THE BANK!

DOWN WITH THE PHARMACEUTICAL COMPANIES!!!! DOWN WITH THEM ALL!!!!

I get by with a little help from my friends

Or rather, they get by with a little help from me, lol.

So while I am a self proclaimed narcisit (I am very self involved and very very vain), I do try to do what I can for my friends. And lately, this seems to be employing them.

I have been blessed with an AMAZING job with a growing start up company, and we are growing. First, my best girlfriend needed a job, and I hooked her up, now one of my other best girl friends (who desperately needed a job) has just been offered a position in my company.

Of course, I will say that if they weren't reliable I would NEVER have even entertained the notion of mentioning them to my boss as it's MY ASS on the line if things go sideways with them, but fortunately I only speak to people who don't suck at life (Of course this has also left me with only ten people to speak to- is it just me or do more and more people fail at life every day? God people are idiots!) so giving them an opportunity to impress the higher ups in my company was a natural move.

So I guess this is both a lol at the fact that I'm slowly but surely filling The Bean with my girlfriends, but also a yay for spending more time with my ladies.

I think I may actually like someone...

So... for the first time since my break-up I think I may actually like someone- and not in a 'let's be friends with benefits kind of way,' or a 'let's hang out occasionally and sure I'll make out with you- why not' kind of way. However... I'm still not sure EXACTLY how I feel.

Man, break-ups really fuck with you don't they? (People are SUCH bastards.) I just keep thinking of these song lyrics over and over in my head "I just want to start again/maybe you can show me how to try."

So, I think I may actually take the big leap and let myself like someone... or I'm seriously considering it anyway. So I think I'm going to start shooting some of my inner demons in the face-

Wish me luck!

Things I'll NEVER stop wanting

There are some things in life that you just can't give up on. Things that you know will never come true but you can't help but yearn for. I find it absolutely appalling that I can't/don't have these things... and yet, at this point, just the wanting them has become hilarious in and of itself... until I think about ACTUALLY having them and HOW COOL it would be. :sigh: Why God did you chose to "bless" me with such an active imagination? So unfair.

1. THE FORCE!: Why God do you taunt me with The Force? I WANT IT!!! I want to be a freaking Jedi soooooo bad!! I want to play mind tricks, and jump really high, and move things with my mind, sooooo cool. (Yes I know, I'm a dork face, I know. But that doesn't make Star Wars any less cool!!!)

2. A WARDROBE TO NARNIA!: Again, God you horrible tease! Alternate universes are so cool, I want one! I want to talk to trees and beavers and fauns! Guh! Life is so unfair! hahaha

3. I WANT TO BE BFF'S WITH FAMOUS PEOPLE!: They just seem more interesting than normal people (Penny in Almost Famous was right!) I want to have a domino night with Hugh Hefner, be BFF's with Slash, I would LOVE LOVE LOVE to make an album with U2, and I would LOVE to date Mathew Morrison... he's a damn dream boat. lol

4. A PERSONAL LIBRARY: Okay, as an English major, book nerd, and biblio, I am currently on my way to creating my own library, but my dream is to have a lovely library like the one in Beauty and the Beast... I would like it to also be filled with super cool antiques!!!

5. A PHOTOGRAPHIC MEMORY: My goal in life is to be infallible, and just knowledgeable about EVERYTHING, my horrible memory is just not cutting it!!! guh!

So those are my top five impossible wishes, if anyone can help me out PLEASE DO IT!!!

Thanks! <3

DON'T CALL IT A COME BACK!

So, for those of you who don't know, I'm a burlesque dancer- and I LOVE IT!!! My love affair with pin up culture started in high school and continues to grow stronger every year!

On Saturday I performed Burlesque with my ladies again for the first time in a VERY LONG TIME and it felt WONDERFUL to be on stage again!! I missed it SOOO MUCH! I love dancing burlesque! It is the most self-empowering thing a woman can do. Feel uncomfortable with your body? Take a burlesque class or a pole class and you will fall in love with YOUR body, not the body the media tells you you are supposed to have! You really connect with yourself and your body and your self image when you strut your stuff on stage! I've never felt better about myself than when I was a full-time burlesque dancer. You feel powerful, and wonderful and sexy. You can control the crowd with a flick of your wrist and the roll of your hips. Burlesque allows you to express both your sensuality and your sexuality. When you're dancing, you are ALL WOMAN! You don't have to apologize for being sensual or having a sex drive- you get to revel in it! And yes, you do go down to pasties in most troupes, but really, it's just a body. They're just boobs. If you're at a burlesque show and you've never seen boobs- have a good look because it's about time. And if you're at a show and you see boobs- it's nothing you haven't seen before. You get more nudity on cable than at a burlesque show, and you know what we're doing? DANCING! Burlesque is a form of DANCE. It is an ART FORM: the art of the tease. And we preform dance routines with the best of them!

So my first show back was at The Pike bar in Long Beach, and we perform there almost every month. It's the smallest stage EVER but the crowd is always enthusiastic and it's always a good time. I had AN ABSOLUTE BLAST!! I was only in three numbers because I'm new to the troupe, but I had two solos (both off the new Slash album bc I LOVE that album- Beautiful Dangerous and Back to Cali) which was kick ass!! Check out some of my pics, and oh hey! The OC Weekly was there- check out my other ladies! We're HOT HOT HOT!! http://www.ocweekly.com/slideshow/the-dirty-little-secrets-burlesque-nsfw-the-pike-bar-and-fish-grill-30321691

If you want to come to our next show, we are performing at the El Ray in LA on August 6th, for more information check us out at http://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Dirty-Little-Secrets-Rock-Burlesque/108754859158814

Thoughts of a Negative Nelly

Tons of thoughts have been going through my head lately, here are the ones that pop up the most

• damn, sometimes living alone sucks
• training your new boss (that no one told you was going to be your boss) to do your job sucks monkey balls
• cooking for one is PATHETIC and makes me want to cry
• work is crazy
• I work too damn hard and deserve a raise... but I also know I won't get one
• cleaning your house after three days of drunk people hanging out in it SUCKS
• I need a damn vacation
• work is crazy
• I need to lose my morals and find a rich man to take me on vacation... and also to purchase internet and tivo for my place
• I hate stupid people.
• work is crazy

clearly I'm a negative Nelly right now. Guh. Let's hope life slows down so I can catch up and as a result feel less negative about the universe!

Busy Busy Bee!

Since my last post, I walked for my BA degree, got my tatoo- finally! and she is AWE to the SOME!

Everyone said, "getting a tat on your rib cage is going to hurt too much!" Blah, blah, blah. But I guess they all forget how tough I am, I barely whined at all! My artist was really impressed! especially since I look like a daintly little princess, lol.

I've also started dating again... kind of... baby steps, lol.

Well that's all for now folks, like I said, I'm a busy busy bee!

T.V.- it's a conspiracy man

For those of you who may not know, I'm not a big fan of t.v.. Commercials make me want to vomit (WHEN did dishwasher soap get sexy?! And why does EVERYONE have to half naked?!), half the time you have no idea what they're advertising anyway, and most of the "entertainment" found inside that little black box is just crap. If I wanted to watch a neighborhood make out with each other I can buy binoculars, and if I wanted to watch women demean themselves for men I'd speak to more girls my age okay! Now, I will say that I do watch some television, I have my "shows," but for the most part I think that t.v. is a big fat waste of time- I also think that it may be being used by the govorners of the free world to keep us all complacent and non-combative.

Okay, yes I'm going a little 'The Man is watching you' and even a little 'beware of Big Brother' but just jump on the conspiracy train for a minute.

What I've noticed:

• This country is going down the rabbit hole- FAST
• My friends who watch little to no television are MUCH more aggravated and politically involved that my friends who watch moderate amounts and lots of t.v. (This includes me, the more time I spend watching t.v. the less I seem to care about the state of this Union. I'll expand on this, don't' worry.)
• There doesn't seem to be the kind of political unrest in countries that have satellites on every house that you see in the poorer countries does there? (Assuming people ACTUALLY watch the news- which, let's face it, most people don't, and even those that do don't pay as much attention to international news because it just isn't available. Personally I think it's because they don't want you to know, but that's just me.)
• What kind of programming is available to watch: utter moralless crap. NOTHING about political activism or getting involved, no role models shown on t.v. are writing their local congressman, even the history channel is showing more "reality" shows than actual historical documentaries- from which we may learn something other than what Miley is wearing and who Britney is having babies with next.

Television, well, media in general really because this also comes across in popular music and even in current fashion, the general message seems to be: right now! Don't worry about the future, just go out to the club, get wasted, go home with someone, worry tomorrow. However, they never say when 'tomorrow' will come. Quite frankly, I'm pretty appalled with my generation. Most of the people my age seem to be self-oriented, unmotivated, irresponsible, whiney sluts who think the world owes them everything and then some. (What? Too harsh?)

But really, when people "tune in" to t.v. they "tune out" of reality, and yes, sometimes that is very much needed, but now I think it's just becoming ridiculous. Checking out every once in a while is fine, the brain needs a break, ya know? But it seems like Americans stopped caring after the disillusion of the 70's and we haven't turned back on yet. Well, hey, guess what America? Now's a PRETTY GOOD TIME TO START GIVING A DAMN!

But I digress...

We, via the television, are constantly bombarded by perfection- pretty, constantly moving colorful objects, and because we've gotten used to that it seems like we need to be constantly entertained (rather than going out searching for something entertaining)- t.v. has made us lazy. Who wants to deal with the fucked up world of reality when the pictures in the t.v. all look so pretty? Why would you want to deal with your problems, much less your Countries problems, when you can sit back and watch all sorts of other people's problems get solved in thirty to sixty minutes or less?

And Hollywood has no original ideas- I'm convinced- so instead of using their imagination, they seem to be going to the next money making eye-grabbing scheme (last week: series, this week: 3-D movies, God help us next week!) so we, as a society, are ever more expecting to be surrounded by big flashy-ness, by fun, by RIGHT NOW, and we don't even bother to realize what is ACTUALLY going on RIGHT NOW. When was the last time Congress did something that was ACTUALLY worth while? (Filibustering DOESN'T count!) Why are our troops still in Iraq? Why don't we have health care? Why are there still no jobs? There are so many questions that need to be answered and yet how many civilians are even bothered to ask the questions? They're too busy living the life that t.v. and popular media is telling them to live, so they are getting drunk and watching t.v. and not reading the newspaper or participating in this democracy.

Personally, as previously mentioned, I care less about what is going on in the world the more I watch t.v., and that speaks pretty strongly to me. When I first moved out on my own, we couldn't afford cable, so we had a t.v. and a dvd player, and that's all we had. So we spent more time reading and interacting with our friends and getting involved because we weren't worried about what was going to be on t.v., and because we needed to find something to do other than the easy solution of: let's just watch t.v.. When I moved in with my now ex-boyfriend, he NEEDED cable t.v., so we had it, and I spent less time reading and less time getting involved politically. Now that I'm on my own, I once again can't afford cable, and I'm spending more time reading and getting politically involved. And this, more than anything else, convinces me that t.v. is just a mind-numbing device, and I also think that the government has picked up on that, and are pushing us more into social media, t.v., movies- everything based on reality but that ISN'T reality to get us to stay quiet while they run things the way they see fit- and clearly, the way they've been doing things isn't working out that great.

So: CHALLENGE!!!

TURN OFF YOUR FREAKING T.V.'S!!!!!! For a week AT LEAST but let's try for something more long term! READ A NEWSPAPER, READ A BOOK, WRITE YOUR CONGRESSMAN- GET INVOLVED!! Stop settling for a fake reality when the real one is waiting right outside your door!

Getting Back on Track

So I've now lived in my new apartment since the end of February, and it finally feels like things are starting to fall into place. Granted I got over my ex already (finding another woman in your bed just expedites that process, let me tell you) and I was seeing another guy briefly, and my friends and I are on track more than ever now that I can hang out with MY friends rather than just my ex's friends, but I was still feeling slightly off.

Now, I'm a little nuerotic- read my blog or know me at all and this will become abundantly clear- so I tend to do a lot of internal psychological analysis (this is just a habit I have, things happen in my life or to my friends and I look for a bigger pattern, or what it could mean, etc.) because I'm weird, but hey, it works for me so whatever, and here is what I've got:

I tend to read several books at a time. One for each genre/mood- this way I have reading for every mood and occasion. Since I first rented my apartment until this past Friday, I had not FINISHED reading ONE book! NOT ONE! I've started several (Slash's autobiography Slash, Sophie's World, The Watchmen, Seduction and the Secret Power of Women: The Lure of Sirens and Mermaids, How to be Single- just to name a few) but just haven't had the umph needed to finish them. Well, last week before our weekly Glee party (I am SUCH a Gleek by the way- so on board with that show!!!!) my girl-friend Rachel brought me more of the Sookie Stackhouse novels- and since Thursday I've finished two of them: Club Dead and Dead to the World. This was great for me! Because I usually finish at least one or two books a month (based on time available, obsession status, and length) my not finishing a single book in several months was starting to bother me. I would start more and just get half way through them and stop. To me, this screamed, "this is part of a larger problem" and I really think it was. My break-up was hard on me and I've been working long hours, and my commitment and attention span hasn't been what it used to be- so the fact that I have made a stand for myself that I really needed to make (no, I won't go over that online thankyouverymuch) and finally finished a few books, I feel like my old self> and DAMN HAVE I MISSED WHO I USED TO BE!! So guess what world? This officially means "The Bitch is back!!"

DEMAND EDUCATION REFORM- I DID, AND SO SHOULD YOU!!!

Hello to those out there in the internet! I have been exponentially appalled with our current education system and have just written my local congressperson to demand immediate reform. PLEASE FOLLOW THE LINK TO FIND YOUR LOCAL CONGRESSPERSON AND WRITE YOUR FRUSTRATIONS!! (https://writerep.house.gov/writerep/welcome.shtml) This is a democracy, we are a country who is run by the people, for the people, if we say NOTHING then NOTHING will happen! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE SPREAD THE MESSAGE THAT WE NEED REFORM!!!!!!


My local congressperson is The Honorable Dana Rohrabacher, and this is what I wrote:

My name is Heather Wallace, I am a hardworking citizen of this country and just received my Bachelor's Degree from CSUF with the hopes of continuing my education to become a High School English teacher- however due to the current state of our Education system I am unsure of whether my dream will become a reality.
I am writing you today to voice my concerns about the direction of our FAILED Education system. Every election we as a people are promised that budget cuts from our Education budget will stop- however all we hear on the news is that there have been more budget cuts, that more teachers are being laid off, more after-school and elective classes are being cut, class sizes are increasing, and there seems to be no plan in place to put money back into our education system, our children, or our future. I AM APPALLED AT THE CURRENT STATE OF OUR EDUCATION SYSTEM AND DEMAND INSTANT REFORM. We are one of the wealthiest states in this union, one of the wealthiest countries in the world, and there is absolutely no reason for our continued neglect! Our government seems to be happy to ignore the growing problems facing those on both sides of the issue- our teachers and our students- and we cannot afford to ignore this issue any longer!

Our teachers are in an ever growing state of need. They perform the most important job in this country- educating and guiding our youth, priming them to take the reins of our future- and yet they are continually assaulted by our government. They are forced to pay for school supplies out of pocket because they have no funding. They are forced to control an ever-increasing class size. They are forced to take pay cuts and see cuts in their benefits. And yet they are still expected to deliver quality test scores and kids who are excited to continue their education and to get involved in their schools and communities. But how can these teachers give the desired results when they are not given the proper tools? These individuals should be given ALL the tools and funding they require to inspire, educate, and teach these kids both course work and life lessons- and yet this task seems nearly impossible under the current circumstances. How can you teach (much less inspire) kids when your class has forty kids crammed together in a small space? This environment evokes distraction- THIS IS NOT A PRODUCTIVE LEARNING ENVIRONMENT. Even worse, this kind of environment is lessoning our teachers drive to reach students and thus slowly choking the quality of the education they are giving, and the ever-increasing pay-cuts and budget cuts do not inspire others to become teachers as it is such a volatile and unrewarding profession as it stands today.

Conversely, our students are even worse off. Every class is packed full- personal and individual attention from a teacher is almost impossible to come by because you are competing with so many other children. Interest in school is waning because after-school activities and elective classes such as choir, band, speech and debate, etc. are no longer available because there is simply no funding for them. As a result of decreased teacher/administrator attention and a lack of school related activities, more children are falling through the cracks.

THIS IS UNACCEPTABLE. OUR CHILDREN ARE OUR FUTURE, HOW CAN WE BE WILLING TO ALLOW THE UNEDUCATED, UNMOTIVATED, AND UNDERWHELMED THAT IS OUR YOUTH TO INHERIT THE EARTH? They hold the keys to our future, they will mold it, build it, and navigate it- and yet we seem UNWILLING to give them the tools- even the choice- to do this.
America is in a critical stage right now, we are at a crossroads. We are no longer the America we used to be; war, internal struggles, a recession, and many other factors have taken the America we used to live in and have turned it into a shadow of its former self. If America is to once again regain its status as a leader in this world, as a leader in Education, WE NEED REFORM.

I myself have felt the pain of this failed Education system. I put myself through college but had to jump through several hoops to do so. Because of the state of the FAFSA requirement s I was unable to receive Federal help (my Mother and I are no longer on speaking terms, and yet her information is required in order to fill out the FAFSA- so I was unable to receive any Federal funding towards my education), and therefore had to work full-time in order to afford my education. On top of that, during my years at school, I was forced to swallow the costs of ever-increasing tuition, increased class sizes, decreased teacher availability, class cuts (both in times/days offered and some classes were cut from the schedule entirely), and other factors that made my overall experience both frustrating and less effective than it could have been because of the frustrations. My senior year (ending in December 2009) I was paying more for tuition, more for books, more for parking- and yet for all this, I received less offered classes, less teacher participation due to increased class sizes, less classes per semester due to forced furlough days, and yet was expected to take all of this without raising a fuss.

How in good conscious can this Union allow matters to continue as they are? Our Education system is flawed, it no longer works. Budget cuts are not the answer. We need to look at our spending and find a solution to put money back into the Education system. The strikes in Capistrano are indicative of the frustrations on both sides of this issue and unless this matter receives immediate attention both our youth, our education system, and our future will be lost.

Demanding immediate reform (and open to any and all conversations),

(here I included my name and ALL of my contact information: my address, my phone number, and my email address because I WANT THEM TO CALL ME, we want to be recognized as real people with real frustrations, and I encourage you to also put in all your information.)


PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE HELP MAKE OUR COUNTRY GREAT- THIS IS HOW A DEMOCRACY WORKS!!!!

Today is Saint George's Day- and I may be a crazy person

I work for a company based in London, and my boss is English (NOT Brittish, lol), so today, on the national holiday named after their patron saint, he sang a song from Jolly Old about England, and this got my mind a-wandering...

Yesterday I walked to the beach with one of my best girl-friends Rachel, and I mentioned how I think it's complete shit that St. George was sainted for killing a dragon when there are no damn dragons. After my boss brought up St. George AGAIN my subconcious (that bastard) took it as a sign that I need to think about this more seriously.

And then I went on Facebook- and this is how it went down, because, as previously mentioned, I may be a crazy person.



my status: happy st. george's day!
Then I made a comment: also: something to ponder- if there are no dragons, then what on earth did he do to gain saint status? kill a gila monster? not likely to be found in europe, so what was he then, a terrific liar?

Then I made another comment: sorry to keep nagging on this but once my brain starts it doesn't stop until it bloody well wants to.

so if this so-called saint was obviously a liar (unless there really are dragons and in which case i'm going to require one IMMEDIATELY), what does that make the catholic church/pope who approved his saintly status? ignorant? naieve? in on the lie?

and if they knew he didn't actually kill a dragon- what does that say about the institution, the process of this religion and it's dominant attractions?

or perhaps this ties in with the era where they were selling indulgences because they needed the money- perhaps he just bought his way in... indulgences by the way, is when they were LITERALLY (this is an actual FACT- martin luther had a lot to say about this actually) selling passes into heaven- people were literally paying a fee to have their sins taken off their permanent record.

that all sounds very morally upstanding and holy doesn't it?



I then posted this on Rachel's wall: you know how i was going on about how that fool didn't kill a dragon yesterday? please see my wall and note how freaking crazy i am. lol


She then posted this on my status: ya know you are not in school anymore, You dont have to think this much!

To which I replied: but this is just how my mind works! cognitive thinking isn't something you can just turn off!

plus i'll be going back soon so i can't get out of practice!

and a beautiful mind is such a tragedy when it's wasted...


To which she said: alright, fair enough.


Then my boss mentioned it's also either Shakespeare's day (good old billy wiggly-stick) or poet's day, which got my mind a-wandering once again...

So on my status I wrote: also, apparently, he was a christian who stood up to the roman's for their unfair treatment of christians at the time- fair enough. i'd saint him for that. but what the dragon??!!! also, it is highly unlikely he ever actually made it to england! he was just trapesing around the continent!

also: now this is just highly ironic: Shakespeare was born ... See Moreon 23 April 1564 and he died on the same day in 1616- hmm.... perhaps he just got creative with his resume and thought he could write like shakespeare (ignore the hundreds of years between them please, it's just an ironic point) hmmm...

Then good old Rachel said: hahahahaha you make me happy!



Please note that NONE of my other friends commented, and like I said, I may be a crazy person.

College Grad- put that in your pipe and smoke it!

So while I technically graduated from CSUF in December, I just got my degree in the mail yesterday,and I walk in May.

This is how the epic moment went down:

So after work I walked to my mailbox like a normal day- but when I saw a package that said, "do not bend" from the Commencement Department at CSUF I knew what it was immediately. I booked it (I walked quickly as I am against running unless my life is on the line) to my pad- slammed the door (terrified my children/cats)carefully ripped open the package, and screamed like I had just won a million dollars!!!! With no one else around I was content to jump up and down in my living room screaming "IT CAME IT CAME IT CAME IT CAME IT CAME!!!!!" I'm pretty sure my neighbors all think I'm a complete nutter now (well to be fair... I have my moments, lol)but they can eat me- I'M A GODDAMNED COLLEGE GRADUATE!!! I bought and paid for my education so I'll scream like a banshee if I want to damn it!

From there I picked up my phone, called my Dad, and proceeded to scream "MY DEGREE CAME IN THE MAIL MY DEGREE CAME IN THE MAIL MY DEGREE CAME IN THE MAIL!!!!!!" Until he just started laughing and said "Good job babe, I'm proud of you." I then promptly hung up and called Grandma. Grandpa picked up the phone and he asked technical questions (because he's grandpa and that's how his mind works) which made me lose my buzz a little- which sucks because if Grandma had picked up the phone she would have screamed along with me, but whatever, I love them all! So I sent out a mass text informing EVERYONE (except my mother and my new chew toy as they don't need to be that involved in my life) called a few more people and proceeded to be stoked on life for the rest of the night. Well, I'm still stoked- day two- so this buzz may last a while!

It's weird, I never let myself get excited about things until I have them because I've had too many things not work out or get ripped away from me, so I never really felt like I did it (although the $10,000 missing from my bank account should have told me); but now that I have that piece of paper I feel like I'm on top of the world!

From there the night went on like this:

Got my ass properly kicked by Gina in my chick boxing class (for info go to hiddentalentsfitness.com- it's a kickboxing class aimed towards fitness and self defense specifically for women- I LOVE that studio! GO!) then went down to the LBC for some good old fashioned karaoke time with the bestie, our friend John, and his pals.

Needless to say it was an EPIC day.

Check out my epicness:

Speed limits are the most retarded things E-VER

I've been thinking about this the last few days, and I think that we should ban all speed limits- and I'm not even being a smart ass, I'm totally serious. I'm sick and tired of being punished just because most people have neither the IQ or the common sense to get through life without ruining it for everyone else. Just because some people suck at life doesn't mean we need 10,000 laws telling the rest of the normally functioning society that we can't do things because the idiots out there may hurt themselves. Let them get hurt!! We have an over population problem anyway! It's time that we stop pandering to the stupid people and start pandering to the intelligent!

Let me explain: I know how to drive my car safely at 100mph, not everyone can- if you can't then you shouldn't do it, and if you do it anyway, your license should be revoked for reckless driving and endangerment. Similarly, if you drive that fast with too many people around, even if you can do it "safely" (I use quotations as it's not safe to drive that fast with too many other drivers on the road) you shouldn't, and your license should be revoked because you're a dumb ass. If you don't know to slow down in residential areas and near schools you're an idiot and you shouldn't be allowed to drive. It's relatively simply, no?

I also think that we should use a point system rather than a ticket system. Driving too fast is minus so many points, etc. etc., and once you run out of points you lose your license- there is a similar system functioning rather nicely in the UK right now. This ensures that all dumb asses stay off the road and don't plow into the rest of us who actually know what they're doing.

There are just too many damn laws in this country, and 90% of them are pointless. If you're too stupid to drive your car and talk on the phone then don't talk on the phone while driving, it's not that difficult! If you don't want to wear your seat belt then don't, and we will all applaud your distance when you get launched during a collision. If you're too drunk to drive and do anyway, we should beat your ass with a stupid stick. These are all solved by people using common sense, but really? I'm so tired of being punished for knowing how to eat, shift gears, talk on the phone, and dance to my radio while driving 80 miles an hour.

I would also like to add that the only car accident I've been in was when I was rear ended at a dead stop- I've never been the cause of an automobile accident.

I KNOW I CAN

If I can beat the illness that I had, I can beat this. Different kind of pain, same kind of resolution, same kind of strength. I beat THAT, I can beat anything. I can and I will. Just watch me.

Always look on the bright side of life, do-do, do-do-do-do

So in an attempt to stabilize the psyche of the girl who's just gone through a horrible break-up (IE: me) I've found it's best to put my best foot forward and start looking on the bright side of life. So let's focus on what I've accomplished shall we?

1) I've reached the magnificent age of 23 without killing myself- that's good.

2) I practically put myself through through college. I think the ratio went something like 70% paid by me 30% paid by Dad, AND I'm debt free. No student loans and a Bachelor's degree in English- not bad.

3) I bought myself a brand new car (again with very very minimal help from la famiglia).

4) I just got a one bedroom apartment with no damn help from anyone AND it's a five minute drive from the sand in HB.

5) I took myself to Paris and Amsterdam- yeah, paid for it myself.

6) I've conquered some very serious health issues, HELL YES I DID!!!!!



Now let's focus on what I have going for me:

1) I've got a good job that pays well and my boss is RAD. Plus they flew me to London for training- that was pretty bad ass.

2) I've got FANTASTIC friends.

3) I'm young, I'm smart, I'm attractive, and I know exactly what I want to do with my life. I just need a few more years of school to get there, and it'll happen.

4) I have a family that loves and supports me, even through my bad decisions (like my last boyfriend).

5) I just premiered an independent film that I starred in- in a movie theater- and we sold almost a hundred tickets (that's a full house minus five seats people!)


Okay. Feeling better about myself. Whew! Don't you hate how even though you KNOW how great you are, some piece of shit boy-disguised-as-a-man can make you feel two inches tall without even trying no matter how fabulous you are?

Well eat that ex-boyfriend!

David Steen: The Final Chapter

So the David Steen and I are finished for good this time. After more than three years of trying to make it work we’ve officially called it quits; well, I’ve called it quits.

For those of you who don’t know our history, I’ll catch you up:

• October 2006: we did Red Noses (a play) together, I had a sex dream about him, and we started having some casual sex. Then I found out he was technically still dating a girl, he just “hadn’t gotten around to officially breaking it off but they both knew it was over.” Needless to say, I should have cut it off then and there, but idiot that I am I didn’t. I gave him miles of shit for it, but didn’t break it off.
• January 2007: I realized I was in love with him. And I didn’t like it one bit as one of his feet was always out the door.
• Not long after that (as I don’t particularly enjoy being ignored) we mutually agreed to stop the casual sex and just stay friends.
• A few months after that he realized how FABOULOUS I am and how nice it is to have an intelligent conversation with the woman you’re having sex with, and this led to an actual relationship, and then, a few months after that, about a month after we went to Amsterdam for my 21st birthday he broke up with me- we’re now around June 2007.
• The ides of March 2008: Well, we never really stopped talking, or even really hanging out, and in no time at all we were back together. The ides of March should have been our first clue, but “love is blindness” and we were VERY much in love. Or as our friend Rob put it: we were stupid for each other. That is probably the most apt phrasing for it come to think of it.
• A few months down the line we started having problems, and he broke up with me for really no reason at all other than commitment issues.
• Then he realized how HORRIBLY he fucked up AGAIN, and fought long and hard to get me back. I mean, he was royally kissing my ass (as well he should!) for a very long time.
• Then we did shrooms, and on April Fool’s Day of 2009 thanks to many hours of a physodellic drug trip, we got back together because I realized I love him; whether it was still or again I didn’t know, I just knew I loved him irrevocably.
• About a month after that we moved in together, and occasionally his siblings. And this pretty much brings us up to date.


I don’t even remember how it officially came up, but let’s start with this: right now, I know four women who are pregnant, and I LOVE kids- far more than regular people actually as most people seem to forget how to use cognitive thinking after puberty- so I’m stoked, especially since one of the said pregnant women is my cousin’s wife, so we’re expecting the first baby in our family in almost eighteen years, so needless to say the excitement is mounting. All I really remember is me coming home from my friend’s house Thursday February 18, 2010 after some girl catch up time, and I ended up having a talk with David about how I wasn’t happy. Now, mind you, this conversation is not new, we’ve had it about every three months since we’ve moved out together- now I know why. Apparently, David changed his mind about kids, even though we’ve talked about it several times, named our unborn children, etc. I mean, he literally yelled, “I want to marry you, I want to have kids with you” when he was trying to get me to take him back the last time, but apparently, right after we moved in together he changed his mind about kids and decided to not tell me. So it came out during that discussion that he doesn’t want kids anymore, and he can’t see himself ever wanting children, and he’s known about this for eight months- so basically, right after I moved in he “changed his mind” and just didn’t tell me (although how you just “change your mind” about something like that is beyond me and how you just fail to mention it is beyond that point still farther). Apparently he decided that he would resent kids because he thinks that they would keep him from doing what he wants to do with his life. Mind you, he wants to do a lot of things, none of which are really feasible at this point in his life, plus I honestly don’t think he REALLY knows what he wants to do with his life anyway, and I don’t want to have kids for another seven or eight years, but he just can’t stand the thought of being held back apparently. Even though millions of people fulfill their dreams and still manage to have families- but whatever.

Needless to say I didn’t take this news very well. There was some yelling, some freaking out, a lot of crying, and some accusations on my part (it felt like he lied to me, which, in a sense, I guess he did) and in the end I asked him to picture his life with kids, to just think about it for 24 hours, and he slept on the couch and I slept in our bed. This was the first night since we started sleeping together all those years ago that we spent the night apart while being under the same roof.

Needless to say, I didn’t sleep that well.

And by “that well” I mean not at all, I don’t think I even got in two hours sleep to be honest.

Luckily (and I mean luckily as in thank Christ here people), I was the only one in the office that Friday, because I spent the entire morning crying. There was a ten minute period where I just laid down on the floor and cried. Then I hollered at my girlfriends, got some balls and some help, and started the apartment search. On the way home that day I actually looked an apartment- and started crying at the question “why are you leaving your current residence.” God, I was a mess.
Well, I called Grandma (as I’ve gone to her with every problem I’ve had) and she told me to get my act together, and I did- as best as I could manage anyway. So when David came home and he told me he definitely didn’t want kids I told him that I had to leave. It was very matter of fact, there was minimal to no crying, I just said “I can’t stay here when this isn’t what I want with my life” when he asked me to stay. Oh yes, he asked me to stay, but I can’t continue to be in a relationship that isn’t going to give me the future I want (especially since I’ve been upfront about wanting kids from the very beginning), it’s a waste of time for everyone involved and all it does is prevent heartbreak, so I hunted for apartments all day Saturday, then got not sober at my bestie’s place, and ended up going home at 7am as I just couldn’t sleep (the whole not sleeping thing was a problem for about a week after that Thursday), and what I came home to that Sunday changed the break up for good.
At this point, we are both still in love, and just heartbroken over the fact that I’ve ended because we want different futures. So I walk in to see a lot of empty beer cans on the kitchen table and our friend Chocolate Bear/Bobby passed out on the couch, and I think, “the boys got up to some drinking last night, fair enough.” And David comes out of our bedroom in his boxers with a hard-on (fair enough, it IS morning after all and he always sleeps in boxers) and gives me these big sad eyes, and holds me for a minute and asks if I’m okay… then I try to go into our bedroom.
AND HE STOPS ME AND TELLS ME SOMEONE IS IN THERE.

This is just over twenty-four hours after I broke it off. None of my stuff is moved out, our sex sheets are still on the bed, and he invited another bitch into OUR bed. They both say that nothing happened, but the fact of the matter is is he betrayed me. Another woman slept where I sleep, next to the man I called MINE and whom I was supposed to marry and have kids with. NOT OKAY.

So I push my way into the room because FUCK THAT and I needed to brush my teeth and I still lived in that god damned apartment for Christ’s sake. She is in the bathroom so by the time she came out she was dressed (which was a bummer, I kind of wish I had pushed my way in immediately instead of freaking out so at least I would know FOR SURE) and by the time I got done brushing my teeth she was getting directions to her car from David. At that point I helpfully said, “What you can sleep next to a woman but you can’t walk her to her car?” I then, of course, walked her ass to her car myself as I had some things to say.

Wait. Did I mention our small couch was unoccupied? Apparently his cousin was supposed to sleep in it but she went to sleep at our friend’s place as he lives in the same complex, but: THERE WAS AN AVAILABLE COUCH. I understand if you don’t want someone to drive after drinking, but they don’t have to sleep in YOUR BED, especially since it was still OUR FUCKING BED.

First thing I said as we started walking was, “David told me nothing happened” to which she promptly agreed and said, “I’m not that kind of girl” (but apparently she’s the kind of girl who will sleep next to a man when his ex hasn’t moved out yet, and it’s been barely twenty-four hours after the breakup, and it wasn’t even a bad we-can’t-get-along breakup, whore.) To which I said, “I believe you, but needless to say what you did was NOT OKAY.” Then I pointed her in the direction of her car, turned on my heel, and ignored the “I’m sorry” that came from behind me.
Second thing I did was email her on Facebook. And thank God David got called in to work- that means I didn’t have to deal with him.

This is what I wrote:
Subject line: About this morning
Just so you know, I believe you both when you say nothing happened. That being said if I do find out something happened and you both lied to me you will find out why people are afraid of me. Also, as you slept where I sleep (next to the man I've loved for three years and whom I was supposed to marry and have children with- and yes we did talk about it, we even named our unborn children just so you know), I would appreciate it if you didn't step foot in my apartment again until I move out. Because this is still where I live, and that was where I sleep. Innocent as your stay may have been, you disrespected me in the most intimate and hurtful way possible. We will never be friends. You violated the feminine code. This situation is hard enough for me as it is without someone who is practically a stranger making it worse.

Then she promptly blew air up my ass because she KNEW she was wrong. I don’t fucking care how drunk you are, you know what bed you’re climbing into, and you know if the man who slides in next to you is wearing pants or not.

She Replied with:
Now that I’ve read [your message], I can honestly say that I respect you more than I did this morning. This doesn’t mean much to you since we are strangers for all intensive purposes. But, you more than earned all of my respect and I will respect all of your wishes. Nothing did happen and I appreciate your ability to take the situation for what it was and not read into it like most women would do. What did happen was horrific enough without any sexual innuendos. I acted without any thought or consideration of your feelings, for that I take full responsibility. I gave you a sincere apology this morning. I have no reservations about admitting when I am wrong. Had you been there or not, I would have told you that I was in the wrong and I am truly sorry.


(I make a very rude noise everytime I read that. Whore.)


Well, after that whole episode I turned bitter (although I did get a little giggle out of “intensive purposes”). And I get a little bit more bitter every time I explain it to someone. Because really, how disrespectful are you? To invite another woman into our bed after breaking up like THAT. After all that we’ve been through? Years of building a friendship, a relationship... he helped me so much, I gave up so much, we went through so much together, grew so much together, we laughed and cried and loved and this is how it ends? With this bitter taste in my mouth? It’s a slap in the face.


Today is March 2, 2010, and exactly one week ago today I signed the lease to my new apartment, and since that day I have moved everything out of David’s place except the plants. I am officially a single woman on my own. And I know I’ll find someone else to love, someone who really deserves me, someone who will fight to KEEP me rather than just someone who fights to get me back after stupidly breaking up with me then giving up again after getting me, but... this is the second time that I’ve dedicated my life to someone. The second time that I’ve planned a life together and a future with someone else, I was on the marriage track, and here I am: all alone and starting over. Again.

I’m seriously starting to believe God is getting loads of entertainment teasing and mocking me.

And I call BULLSHIT.

The hardest lesson I ever had to learn is: love isn't always enough

I've had two very serious relationships, and unfortunately, one thing that I've learned during those relationships is that no matter how much you love someone, or how much they love you, love isn't always enough. For a relationship to be everything that it can be and needs to be it takes more than love, it takes like-mindedness, open mindedness, endless compromise, complete trust, and you have to want the same thing for your future together (among countless other details) for everything to run smoothly.

I am currently remembering that lesson right now, and it is really making this transition so much easier for me. Me and my now ex-boyfriend are still very much in love, but he has decided that children are no longer in his future, and so I had to leave. I’ve always seen myself as a mother and that is a non-negotiable for me. So I am now licking my wounds and am moving into an apartment where I will be on my own for the first time in my life. I am really trying to stay positive, but I feel like my entire future was laid before my feet and the carpet was just ripped out from under me and I find myself wondering where that beautiful carpet has gone. It is amazing how quickly things change, but I am very very fortunate that I am blessed with the friends and family that I have. They are what is keeping me going, and keeping busy is what is keeping me from breaking down.

I am a very strong person- I always have been and I hope to God I always will be. But one has to wonder how many times a tree can bend before it breaks in half.

I’m hoping I’m filled with bamboo rather than oak.

Mourning the death of the Art of making an album

Have you noticed that most albums (or cd's for you youngins) that are released now-a-days are complete shit? The general model seems to be make one or two hit songs that you can blast in clubs and bars (and most of these are over-systhesized as to hide the artist's lack of talent- but I digress as a tangent of my lack of love for most modern music would last forever- perhaps I'll save that topic for a later date) and then spend the rest of the time in the studio making filler-songs that suck. The end result is a tumultuous gathering of mixed-matched ideas that neither flow together, or result in a singular message or intent. This leaves the listener either vastly disapointed or simply confused (as well it should).

Now don't get me wrong, I am all for showing your range, and I am all about being ecclectic and trying different things, but you can do that on one album and still have a linear message/sound/purpose. Remember Alice Cooper? Now HE knows how to make a good album! 'Along came a Spider' and 'Welcome to my Nightmare' are both great examples of albums that have a singular message and a fluid sound from track 1 to the last seconds of the album (although, granted, they are both concept albums) and yet have depth and meaning. Another band that knows how to make a good album is U2, from day one (I'm talking the 'Boy' days and before here kids) their albums had a purpose, their music had direction, and their albums were well constructed and took you on a musical journey that was both technically satisfying as well as musically diverse. This band is also an example of the use of range as their albums tend to be mood driven: the early ones more political, the late nineties more dance-pop driven, and the rest just good old fasioned tunage- but you can see the band evolve and grow and try new things while still managing to maintain a straight line of intent.

I guess the music industry is both loving and hating the rise of music downloading in the age of the ipod. On one hand you have the problem of the industry loosing money hand over fist due to illegal downloading (although perhaps if they marketed TALENT rather than ATTRACTIVENESS they might sell more records) but on the other hand, being able to get songs one a time works great for this new craze of hits and shits- let me explain: you can buy the one or two good tracks on an album and leave the shit songs alone; in this model your ears aren't assaulted by the crap filler tunes and your wallet isn't bitter about spending $20 on an album just to get a few good tracks. This seems to be a great problem solver! But how about this: how about the music industry decides to dedicate time and TALENT to the records they are putting out? Let's go for QUALITY rather than a "right now hit" that will flood the clubs and fade with the last call and die with the hangover. How about that?

Well Hello world of the Internet! (again)

So, I'm blogging now. And why is that? Because as usual my sister won't leave me alone about doing it, so now I am. It's how I started my internet parusal via myspace (yes, my sister made my first myspace account, shaddup) and many, many life experiences that we don't need to go into detail on the internet, lol. So sissy, this is for you, I hope it's everything you wanted it to be; and if it isn't, I hope it annoys the bejesus out of you. As for the rest of you, I hope enjoy the ramblings of a Heifer Walrus, and if you don't, then don't read them.

P.S. If you haven't picked up on this by now, she's the eldest, and I'm the annoying lis sis :)